Summer is the Sexy Narcissist You Need to Stop Dating
For those of us living in Oregon, we spend the entire year gray-skied and shivering, essentially living for this exact moment. The sun is out, the energy is shifting, and the transition of the season brings that beautiful, familiar invitation to pause and take in what’s here, now.
But here’s my hot take…
Summer? Summer is that sexy narcissist who keeps sucking you back in.
(Mind you, I’m speaking on behalf of us vanillas who identify as straight, white-ass women, so please interpret and adjust for your personal preferences).
But for real—our relationship with summer can be low-key toxic as fuck if we transition into it in a vulnerable state.
Love Bombed by "Daddy Summer"
When we enter this season feeling a bit disconnected from ourselves, stuck up in the clouds of fantasy and unmet expectations, we come into summer looking to be saved. We want to be swept off our feet. And summer is more than happy to love-bomb the shit out of us.
It tells us everything we want to hear:
"You’re so stunning with your golden, sun-kissed skin, girl. Look at those natural waves effortlessly flowing in the breeze! You don’t even need makeup. You’re perfect."
Summer promises all the excitement, fun, and novelty you’ve been starving for all year. It whispers, “Sit back, baby, let Daddy Summer take you for the ride of your life.”
And those first few weeks? You’re riding high. You are drowning in that NRE (New Relationship Energy, duhh). You’re saying YES to everything. Camping trips, paddleboarding, BBQs, berry picking, concerts, coastal adventures, rooftop martinis, dancing in the god damn moonlight. You’ve never felt so free.
The Slow Creep of the Burnout
Then, a sloooow shift starts to happen. It's so subtle you don’t even realize you’ve put summer on a pedestal and completely abandoned everything you thought you knew about yourself.
Suddenly, you’re exhausted, a little cunty, and fucking sweaty.
You start to question what you actually want, but Daddy Summer is already gaslighting you, planting ideas in your head: “You’re not tired. Only losers get tired during the summer. You’re not a loser, are you?”
Your internal voice is screaming, WTF?! But your ego is chiming in with, “I’m not a loser!” So you suck it up, buttercup. You put on a fake-ass, boxy grin and keep trudging ahead.
God forbid you say no to one BBQ because you need a moment of peace and quiet. Ohhh no, Daddy Summer will never let you forget it. He’ll look at you and say, “I noticed you haven’t talked to [insert friend here] since you skipped her BBQ. She probably hates you now. Your hot friend [insert your hottest friend here] went. It’s so attractive when women say yes... you’re being pretty gross by saying no to fun things. Maybe I should go hang out with [said hot friend].”
OMG, Daddy Summer, what the actual fuck?!
By early September, your awareness finally kicks in. You look at your exhausted, sunburned, emotionally depleted face in the river’s reflection and realize, “Get me the fuck out of this.” You muster the courage to say 🖕to the season. You're broken, a shell of who you once were.
And as you wipe away the salty sweat and tears, you see something beautiful in the distance. It smells like pumpkin. It’s Fall. Cool, kind, supportive Fall, waiting with open arms to wrap you in a cozy flannel, put you in a big, dumb, hat, and whisper a sweet breeze across your face to dry your eyes.
The Reality Check: Fire, Pitta, and Your Root
Alright, let’s step back from this wild, unhinged fantasy for a second. What’s actually happening here?
Summer is incredible, but it is a season of pure, abundant fire. In Ayurveda (the sister science of yoga and ancient system of medicine), summer is ruled by Pitta dosha, which is governed by fire and water. Fire transforms, but untamed fire burns things to the ground.
If we enter this fiery season already disconnected from our center, we are completely vulnerable to getting swept away by its seductive, chaotic passion.
The secret to surviving the heat? You have to stay rooted in your foundation.
In yoga, we talk about Muladhara—the root chakra. It governs your primal right to exist exactly as you are. Nourishing your root chakra doesn't mean hiding inside all summer; it means experiencing life rather than just surviving the hectic pace of it. It means living and savoring each sweet moment instead of letting the season blow right by you like a herky jerky, whiplash-inducing, state fair carnie coaster.
A Compassionate Reminder
If you related to any of this crazy narrative, congratulations: you’re human. You are not alone in that feeling.
So let this season be a sweet, slow reminder: You are not a problem that needs solving. You don’t need "Daddy Summer" to come fix you, validate you, or tell you you're worthy of fun.
Take a moment right now to step back into your body. Slow down. Touch grass. Feel your breath move through you. You have permission to say no to the BBQ if your spirit needs silence.
Listen to your own innate wisdom, stay connected to your roots, and allow this season to unfold exactly as it’s supposed to—with joy, effortlessness, and genuine authenticity.
Tend to your root and slow down at the Summer Yoga Picnic Series, every month through September.
